Wednesday, February 28, 2007

lester won't be accompanying me today. she's been my commute buddy since january and at the same time, she's been helping me out lately. splurging her money for coffee so that we don't have to go home after work.

and since she'll be going out with her mom, i have no choice but to go home.

poor me. am going to sulk again. maybe mocha frap's coming back to make me feel better.

Monday, February 26, 2007

so many thoughts in my head for these past few days. been planning to post something.. anything but i can't find the time to do so. haha. busy with work [oh come on..].
what's really happening with leah now.
iman and i broke up already. been dealing it with it for almost a month now. i'm telling you, it's not easy to follow every advice that i heard because what i feel is entirely different from what they want me to do. hearing him say those words in front me didn't make it easier.
it's like wanting to take the dive but then not knowing how to swim. so choose. go straight ahead and end up sinking deeper or stay where you're at right now and wait for the time that you're brave enough to take the plunge. i chose the latter.
been holding to a twinge of hope. so little that it seems there's really none.
dark clouds everyday and not knowing what to ask from God.
i'm becoming uber sensitive lately, taking every comment and letting it affect me. esdi made me cry. haha. ;)
and hearing boy abunda talking about meryll having a bipolar disorder, made me think that probably i'm a manic depressive as well.
and i can't find the courage to tell my mom about it because i don't want her asking me questions and lecturing me and telling me that she's been right all along. grrr.
and i can't stop asking why am i going through this. i mean, some people are happy with their lives enenthough they don't deserve it. so how come why i am here and they're there? [huh labo] or probably i'll just borrow this line from kris aquino, when everything's fine with my life, i never questioned God, so now that i have problems, i'm not going to ask God why this is happening to me. not the exact lines, though but i think i got the point. :)